Got a reply to my second email...not going to repost it, but they're going to wait until the last batch comes back from clearcoat, pick one out of there and send it to me. See how I like it, and then I send them the other one back in the same box.
I'm happy with this solution. I wasn't going to be doing the swap within the next few weeks anyways, this gives me time to get Pinbot cleaned and tuned up so that I have something to play while Shuttle is out of commission, and time to disassemble Shuttle and shoot video of the teardown process.
I didn't specifically ask for a swap or even a refund, I just sent an email with my concerns about it. This solution was offered by them, and I'm pretty damn impressed, frankly. What they're doing, and especially not making me ship the one back first on my own dime, I feel is extremely generous on their part.
That's some customer service right there. Maybe Stern should learn that, from our recent threads here...