Hilarious!
From http://www.ninersnation.com/2008/1/9/13329/56440:
# Patrick Willis once sacked the quarterback before the ball was snapped. He was not offsides.
# Patrick Willis wears pads and a helmet because it is mandated by the league rules. Everyone else in the NFL wears pads and a helmet because of Patrick Willis.
# Patrick Willis once returned a fumble and an interception for a touchdown on the same play.
# Patrick Willis likes his eggs sunny side up, with salt, pepper, and ground wide receiver.
# Chances are, at some point in your life, you have, or will be tackled by Patrick Willis.
# It has been said that Barry Bonds once hit a homerun and the ball never landed. This is not true. The story has been confused with that of the time that Patrick Willis once hit a running back, who never landed.
# Patrick Willis once tackled a running back simply by looking at him.
# Patrick Willis tackled the Virgin Mary and Jesus was born.
# Patrick Willis knows exactly where in the world Carmen San Diego is...because he dropped her ass for a 5 yard loss.
# Patrick Willis wasnt the eleventh pick of the draft, he was the first...TWICE.
# The NFL has renamed the "injury list" to "Hotel Willis"
# For his workouts, Patrick Willis bench presses Larry Allen.
# On draft day, commissioner Goodell offered his hand in congratulations. Instead, Patrick Willis tackled him through the podium.
# If Patrick Willis and Chuck Norris were in a room at the same time it would prematurely cause the second coming of Christ.
# Patrick Willis plays Linebacker, because if he played running back he would still get tackled by Patrick Willis.
# Football is like a one man cold to Patrick Willis, he's the only one catching it, he's the only one coming down with it.
# When Patrick Willis was born, he was already flagged for unnecessary roughness.
# Patrick Willis is immortal, solely because the grim reaper is scared to get tackled by him.
From http://www.ninersnation.com/2008/1/9/13329/56440:
# Patrick Willis once sacked the quarterback before the ball was snapped. He was not offsides.
# Patrick Willis wears pads and a helmet because it is mandated by the league rules. Everyone else in the NFL wears pads and a helmet because of Patrick Willis.
# Patrick Willis once returned a fumble and an interception for a touchdown on the same play.
# Patrick Willis likes his eggs sunny side up, with salt, pepper, and ground wide receiver.
# Chances are, at some point in your life, you have, or will be tackled by Patrick Willis.
# It has been said that Barry Bonds once hit a homerun and the ball never landed. This is not true. The story has been confused with that of the time that Patrick Willis once hit a running back, who never landed.
# Patrick Willis once tackled a running back simply by looking at him.
# Patrick Willis tackled the Virgin Mary and Jesus was born.
# Patrick Willis knows exactly where in the world Carmen San Diego is...because he dropped her ass for a 5 yard loss.
# Patrick Willis wasnt the eleventh pick of the draft, he was the first...TWICE.
# The NFL has renamed the "injury list" to "Hotel Willis"
# For his workouts, Patrick Willis bench presses Larry Allen.
# On draft day, commissioner Goodell offered his hand in congratulations. Instead, Patrick Willis tackled him through the podium.
# If Patrick Willis and Chuck Norris were in a room at the same time it would prematurely cause the second coming of Christ.
# Patrick Willis plays Linebacker, because if he played running back he would still get tackled by Patrick Willis.
# Football is like a one man cold to Patrick Willis, he's the only one catching it, he's the only one coming down with it.
# When Patrick Willis was born, he was already flagged for unnecessary roughness.
# Patrick Willis is immortal, solely because the grim reaper is scared to get tackled by him.
Last edited:
