If your Arcade games could talk, what would they say?

They'd scream for help, because as soon as they start talking to me I'm smashing them with a sledgehammer.
 
"Stop playing pinball, you asshole!" - my vids

"Don't listen to them, David. You're not an asshole. Hey... Have you lost weight? Either way, you're looking quite handsome today." - my pins
 
a couple of mine would say very loudly ( I have to fix the volume) Please turn us on and play us.
A couple of others Its cold out here in the garage, please bring us in and play us.
its cold out here in the garage, please fix us so you can bring us in and play us.
i don't play as much as i should...
 
"Oh god, something on me is sticky."

"Dude this storage unit is cold.."

"OH GOD THERE'S SPIDERS!!!"

This made me feel sad,

"Life was hard on me in the 1980's but now I get a lot of rest".

and this made it better! I know they're inanimate objects but I'm guilty of very slightly personifying them sometimes. Not to the point that I think they are real, but I feel bad when I don't play 'em enough. :D They sure have all been through a lot.
 
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