I hope they are able to keep her pain under control, they are generally very good at that, which makes it much easier for the patient and the family. Taking a break every now and then should help you too...
We are thinking of you...
Grim News
- Thread starter teckkev
- Start date
I hope they are able to keep her pain under control, they are generally very good at that, which makes it much easier for the patient and the family. Taking a break every now and then should help you too...
We are thinking of you...
Kev, my condolences. Always saddened to read this kind of stuff...stay strong, hang close with your dad, and you are all in my thoughts and prayers. You've got tons of friends here!
bit_slicer
New member
+1M! We're here for you, in our thoughts and prayers.
mudhens1
Active member
I've been on vacation and just got my pc back online after a crash, so i just now read this thread...i would've responded sooner had i known...you're doing the right thing by being there for her, in spite of being exhausted...hang in there and let me know if you need anything....talk to you soon
OP
OP
teckkev
New member
Last night was not good. They increased her morphine IV 5x (3x within an hour). She kept pleading with my dad and I to get her out of there. I had to finally tell her to move on. I said 'mom, I'm here fighting with you'. She replied, I know you are. I then told her it is time to stop fighting. We are proud of your effort, but it is time to let it go and move on. I saw tears in her eyes. Nurse confirmed my suspicion that it will more likely be this weekend she moves on. To make matters worse, their daughter (a spoiled bitch), is giving the whole family alot of crap. Her mom spoiled her. She lives on welfare with 3 kids (she has 5) and her mom pays her rent, new car, utilities, and giving her $100-250 cash a week. Daughter is only sad about losing her free ride. Top it off.. When mom was bed riddin right before going to the hospital, daughter had the balls to tell her mom to fix her car. Dad took care of it. He took the day off returned the car to her, only to hear her say 'how are you getting home?'. She told him to call someone to take him home. She also caused bad tides between mom and I 2 months ago over her damn PC. Dad and I talked about his will many times in the past 8 months. Daughter now from getting her equal share, was at $50,000. He is now taking her out completely. <-- I think that is him hurting making that last decision.
Can anyone tell me this.. How is it when you have perfect parents who would do anything and has done everything for their kids can get kicked on by their daughter who's only mourning the loss of a meal ticket??? Damn, Wife had to go to cash advance for the 1st time ever today since we have $2.xx in the account when I hecked it. I know dad would give me money, but no way in hell I'm asking. For the record, I just got done paying bunch of monthly bills when I got the news. Traveling near an hour each way /every day adds up fast. I know I am rambling, but the daughter really disgusts me. Going to take shower now and head back down to the hospice.
Take care all and again, thanks for the kind words,
Kevin
Can anyone tell me this.. How is it when you have perfect parents who would do anything and has done everything for their kids can get kicked on by their daughter who's only mourning the loss of a meal ticket??? Damn, Wife had to go to cash advance for the 1st time ever today since we have $2.xx in the account when I hecked it. I know dad would give me money, but no way in hell I'm asking. For the record, I just got done paying bunch of monthly bills when I got the news. Traveling near an hour each way /every day adds up fast. I know I am rambling, but the daughter really disgusts me. Going to take shower now and head back down to the hospice.
Take care all and again, thanks for the kind words,
Kevin
zork40
Active member
Hi Kevin,
I'm sorry to hear about this. It's a horrible thing to go through. I just lost my Mother in Law earlier this month and my grandmother in February.
As for the BS with her daughter, that is just nuts. I'm going through similar crap with my sister. She took my grandfather down to live with her for 5 months after our grandmother died and drained his bank account dry. She blew about 2400/month without him knowing. That same man she did that to let her live in an in-law apt. at his house for 14 years rent free. Sorry to hear you have to deal with that crap on top of your Mom's situation. Hang in there.
I'm sorry to hear about this. It's a horrible thing to go through. I just lost my Mother in Law earlier this month and my grandmother in February.
As for the BS with her daughter, that is just nuts. I'm going through similar crap with my sister. She took my grandfather down to live with her for 5 months after our grandmother died and drained his bank account dry. She blew about 2400/month without him knowing. That same man she did that to let her live in an in-law apt. at his house for 14 years rent free. Sorry to hear you have to deal with that crap on top of your Mom's situation. Hang in there.
OP
OP
teckkev
New member
Just got home. Drama over daughter was ridicolous today. She took over her mom's email and myspace accounts to delete everyones emails and myspace friends lists (getting rid of family members from it). Myself, I careless. My email were for mom to read. It is not like mom will be reading them.
Mom mostly slept today. It seems I am the one she doesn't know now. <-- I'm ok with that. Dad broke down near the end of the night. He got his composure back quickly. For those who want a visuale of mom's current condition, just imaging photos of the cleanup at the concentration camp when allied forces came. Her body frame is identical. Little humor now.. with her hair starting to grow back and her bony face/head.. she looks like Mark Martin in Nascar
Myself, I have no tears for mom. I accepted her fate, I had my goodbye, and I know her passing will be a blessing for her and everyone close to her. I'll save my tears now for dad when he needs them. Her time is very near.
Kevin
Mom mostly slept today. It seems I am the one she doesn't know now. <-- I'm ok with that. Dad broke down near the end of the night. He got his composure back quickly. For those who want a visuale of mom's current condition, just imaging photos of the cleanup at the concentration camp when allied forces came. Her body frame is identical. Little humor now.. with her hair starting to grow back and her bony face/head.. she looks like Mark Martin in Nascar
Myself, I have no tears for mom. I accepted her fate, I had my goodbye, and I know her passing will be a blessing for her and everyone close to her. I'll save my tears now for dad when he needs them. Her time is very near.Kevin
ddonaldson
Member
Be strong for dad..
Our prayers are with you.
Don't worry dear old daughter, she will get her comeuppance in the end.
Our prayers are with you.
Don't worry dear old daughter, she will get her comeuppance in the end.
FullThrottle
Active member
Kevin, reading this thread is breaking my heart, almost identical to my grandma's condition dying of cancer, in hospice daily for weeks, crazy uncle who wanted it all, and some laughter during the darkest days... Cancer gets the best of 'em... Glad to see your spirits appear higher than before. My mom turned 50 yesterday and seeing her grey hair coming thru her brown during dinner I couldn't help but wonder not if but when... My dad is 56 and all grey turning silver hair now. I hope they live ALOT longer, but as the family average goes I know one of them is gone in less than 20.
Stay strong and as we said before, you've got lots of friends here, don't feel bad or ashamed to lean on our shoulders... the klov brotherhood is here for ya' - AMEN
Stay strong and as we said before, you've got lots of friends here, don't feel bad or ashamed to lean on our shoulders... the klov brotherhood is here for ya' - AMEN
Trackball
Well-known member
My family is pulling for you to stay strong my friend.
My Grandma passed away in a hospice in 99'. It was tough because she was the only family I was close to on my Biological Dad's side, including my Dad. I took her for granted when she was around, thinking she'd always be there... When she had her stroke and was first admitted to the hospital then moved to the hospice, she kept asking for me. Back then, cel phones were just becoming popular. I didn't have one so they kept trying to reach me on my land line. Of course it was always busy because, like a cad, I was hooked on EverQuest...Well somehow, word got to me and I flew out to AZ to see her at the hospice. By the time I arrived, her body was still alive but she was no longer conscious. I held her hand and read to her aloud..I think it was a Frank McCourt book, I can't remember who wrote it, and it was about love and letting go.. I like to think she heard my voice, felt my hand and tears and knew her Grandson finally made it to her side for her final moments.
Hang in there Kevin.
Tom
Hang in there Kevin.
Tom
OP
OP
teckkev
New member
Sorry for no updates lately. It is going downhill now. Yesterday afternoon, real signs are showing. I guess her kidneys are now not working. I think today (I hope) will be the day she goes.
Kevin
Kevin
Hang in there Kevin. It sucks. When my father was dying in February, I stayed as long as I could, but I had to leave just to keep from losing it. Hospice is the right place for your mother. They were awesome for my father.
The only things I can say are that time will heal a lot of the hurt and don't hold it in. I was amazed at how much better I felt after I had gotten a lot of my feelings out by writing them down. Even if I didn't always push the send button.
Keep talking to your father, it sounds like he needs you the way my mother did. And just try your best to ignore your sister. There are some people that are just a waste of space.
ken
The only things I can say are that time will heal a lot of the hurt and don't hold it in. I was amazed at how much better I felt after I had gotten a lot of my feelings out by writing them down. Even if I didn't always push the send button.
Keep talking to your father, it sounds like he needs you the way my mother did. And just try your best to ignore your sister. There are some people that are just a waste of space.
ken
Man, thats got to be tough. Im sorry man. If therres anything i can do, please let me know.
Kevin,
I know how hard this is... and I hope she goes peacefully and painlessly... I hope you are holding up okay.
Know we are here for you!
I know how hard this is... and I hope she goes peacefully and painlessly... I hope you are holding up okay.
Know we are here for you!
OP
OP
teckkev
New member
2:15AM She passed away. I had a blowup yesterday that could have gotten severe. I been showing no emotion for a week or more. I have been staying at my dad's and spending all morning/noon/night at my mom's bedside. Her mom keeps popping off with comments that I am not her daughters kid. I finally confronted her about it privately and politely. She had the balls to deny it and laugh. I went out side and turned my pain into pure anger. Wife went and got dad. Dad came out and I just exploded with tears. It truly felt great. This morning when she passed, I shed a few tears, but I had a smile. I am actually truly happy with her passing. To see her suffer day after day like I was. It was a blessing to see her in peace. Mom's side of the family, I will never have to deal with ever again and that is a load off my shoulders. Dad, his side of the family have accepted me and mad me feel very welcomed into the family. I have not had any sleep for over 48 hours. I doubt I will get any till tonight. Again, forum reply's were a great comfort/boost to read (over/over) to keep mind occupied when needed.
Take Care,
Kevin
Take Care,
Kevin
sonnyburnett
New member
- Joined
- Nov 14, 2007
- Messages
- 3,187
- Reaction score
- 582
My condolences Kevin,
You take care now and get some rest if you can.
Think she will be smilling down upon you from heaven now.
You take care now and get some rest if you can.
Think she will be smilling down upon you from heaven now.
bit_slicer
New member
She's in a better place now, and despite all the pain it sounds like you are too. We wish you well.
LUCKYMAN
New member
Sorry to hear about your loss, i cant even imagine, may god bless you and your family!!!
