Do you give first to respond "rights"?

joemagiera

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I offered something for sale and got a few responses from people saying they'd take it at my asking price. I hadn't committed to anyone or taken payment from anyone. I decided to sell to someone that wasn't the first to respond, but someone I had dealt with before.

The first guy to respond was really upset about it, cuz "he was first".

What do you guys think? Do you think being first to respond saying you'll take it at the given price gives you any type of rights over anyone else that may respond? This is assuming you haven't paid anything or received any notice from the seller that he commits to selling it to you.

Obviously one of my mistakes was mentioning in one of the emails that he was the first to respond. I won't make that mistake again.
 
I long got tired of tire kickers that respond wanting it "for sure", never to be heard from again, first to put money in my hand gets it.

The only exception to this rule, is like you already said...someone I've dealt with before, that I know will follow through.

You want something "first dibs", go to a store!
 
I personaly think that the first to respond gets it. But, If you get an overwheling response .... the first to pay gets it. There always seems that the "tire kickers" are interested and need to add more funds to their PayPal acct before they can pay. People like that need to get their act together and actually have the $20 already in their account before they start trying to buy things here.

Thats my 2 cents
Jim
 
I think it depends on how you're selling the item.

For hammering out deals online, I wouldn't expect to have "dibs" unless I'd sent an offer and gotten confirmation from the seller that it was mine and I needed to send payment. Like Cinder said, it's a question of who is willing to put the money in the seller's hand first.

For local deals (Craigslist, etc), I think there's a little bit more nuance to it. I've bought and sold on Craigslist, and I always make the deal over the phone and schedule a specific time to inspect, test and (if it's as-described) load the item. I hate it when sellers tell me that a game is going to the first person to reach their door... I'm not going to pack my tools, grab a dolly, rent a trailer, and drive 80 miles to someone's middle-of-nowhere house if they can't even promise that the machine will still be there when I arrive.
 
On more than one occasion I've sold to first responders, when I have higher offers come in after the fact. while waiting for first responder to fully decide to make a purchase.

I thinks it's good karma. And first come first serve.

BUT I have sold to a second responder cause that person had sold me an item recently for a good price.
 
The first responder via PM is who gets first dibs for me, not the first to post in the thread. I asked them to contact me, not let everyone else know they were interested. They get a certain amount of time to close the deal, and then I go to the next person.

Just because someone posted 1st in the thread doesn't mean they were first to contact you. They'd never know if you were being honest about someone contacting you via PM first, so they'd have no argument.

And for PM's, I only count, "I'll take it" PM's as dibs. If someone sends me a PM asking if I'll take less or if I'll trade, then I answer politely and go to the next PM. If I'm selling something for $50, and the 1st person asks if I'll take $40 and the 2nd say he'll take it for $50, then the 2nd person gets it. The 1st person didn't commit, the 2nd one did...
 
there are many people I will not sell to or buy from. There is NO WAY I would adhere to first to respond gets it.

First person I tell to send me money and they send it, gets it.

There have been a number of occasions where I have offered something for sale, and a local guy pm's me and says he wants it.
Done deal, assuming I haven't committed selling it or taken money for it.

On most occasions first responder gets it, but that is not a "rule to live by" in my opinion.
 
I usually do first to PM as well, but there are limits. It's very situational. I've been totally screwed by a few "firsts" that claimed to want something just to flake several months later (and everyone that was interested had spent that space/time/money on something else).

With this free Tempest project, I had to skip a first for someone that was willing to pick it up ASAP. I needed the room badly. As long as the person is reasonable and it's clear what the priority is, there shouldn't be a big hoopla over it.

Where you're gonna get rep-fucked is if you're skipping the first guy, blatantly, because someone offered more cash or you're trying to turn the situation into a price bid. "You're allowed to make money" argument aside, it's a very tacky move.

In your case, whatever. It's a case of convenience, which isn't a big deal. If both of you are reasonable, you both should be able to move on from this little hiccup.
 
It's your item, sell it to who ever you want to. There's no rules. If people don't like it tough ti-tay!
 
Your ad should simply state, "First come first serve. NO EMAILS. Expect to pick item up today."
Whom ever calls first gets the deal. Why even leave yourself open to emails?
I guess I'm different. I would never cancel a deal on someone just because someone I knew called or emailed me after the fact. I treat others as I expect to be treated in return.
 
I usually do first 'looks like they'll actually complete the deal', but I do e-mail or PM, so they don't know if they were actually first or not. Especially with CL postings I find it useful to be able to filter them a bit, since so many CL posters are flakes.
 
First to commit, end of discussion. I, too, have had the first pm offer lower amounts and/or say they can't pay until the second Thursday after Easter. If you want the product then commit to buy and pay within a reasonable timeframe, 48 hours is my opinion of reasonable. The first guy to ask for additional pictures did not commit to buy, neither did the first guy to offer to trade me 12 pounds of soiled diapers...


All of that being said, if I know someone is looking for something I have then I will often contact that person before listing anything publicly. I usually give anyone I contact this way up to a week to pay.
 
My opinion is...

If you started a thread to sell it...

First to post that they want it / PM's has 'dibs.'



If you didn't start a thread on here to sell it, then all these other 'outs' exist. But if you're selling it via KLOV thread, then there should be a dibbage.

Just my 2 pennies.
 
My opinion is...

If you started a thread to sell it...

First to post that they want it / PM's has 'dibs.'



If you didn't start a thread on here to sell it, then all these other 'outs' exist. But if you're selling it via KLOV thread, then there should be a dibbage.

Just my 2 pennies.
That's decent logic, but there are some guys who I will never deal with, what do you do then?

And as I say that, I have always up to this point, given the first responder "dibs" . I reserve the right not to is all I am saying. :) peace
 
That's decent logic, but there are some guys who I will never deal with, what do you do then?

And as I say that, I have always up to this point, given the first responder "dibs" . I reserve the right not to is all I am saying. :) peace

Yeah, I hear ya. It's no 'binding contract'... Just my way of seeing it. Kinda like... When in Rome, if you will... ;)

I would totally void first dibs to a known flakey-flake, though... But I would let them know that, as well.

Just how I was raised... Times, they are a changin'.
 
You can sell to whoever you want. Everyone will let a buddy jump line if it happens. Just as long as you didn't "shake hands" with the first responder or exchange money...

Did you tell the first guy that it was his, or just that he was the first to respond?

Wade


I offered something for sale and got a few responses from people saying they'd take it at my asking price. I hadn't committed to anyone or taken payment from anyone. I decided to sell to someone that wasn't the first to respond, but someone I had dealt with before.

The first guy to respond was really upset about it, cuz "he was first".

What do you guys think? Do you think being first to respond saying you'll take it at the given price gives you any type of rights over anyone else that may respond? This is assuming you haven't paid anything or received any notice from the seller that he commits to selling it to you.

Obviously one of my mistakes was mentioning in one of the emails that he was the first to respond. I won't make that mistake again.
 
Also, in my experience, even the first person to commit to a purchase is OFTEN not someone who will follow through. I think there are a lot of people who adhere to the "dibs" line of thinking but they don't adhere to follow-through nearly as seriously. So why should someone take an "I'll take it!" as a true commitment unless the buyer has PAID?

Wade
 
I long got tired of tire kickers that respond wanting it "for sure", never to be heard from again, first to put money in my hand gets it.

The only exception to this rule, is like you already said...someone I've dealt with before, that I know will follow through.

Ditto. Unless I know you and "I'll take it" from you is as good as cash *to me*, then you call "dibs" by putting money in my hand.
 
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